Saturday, August 29, 2009

How To Recover From a Breakup

Dealing with a breakup and learning how to recover is hard. Majority of break ups leave one feeling lonely and depressed, even if they are the ones who initiated the break up. The emotional damage of the breakup itself makes it hard to even think straight. Your head is filled with so many conflicting thoughts and emotions that you don't know which way to turn. Here is some advice that will help you to get organized and learn how to recover from a breakup:

The 24 Hour Mope
For the next 24 hours you are entitled to a whole day of crying, lounging in your pajamas, and eating a gallon of ice cream. Be sad and lazy the whole day if you need it. Do not feel guilty for taking this whole day either. Your heart was just broken by someone you liked, loved, or trusted.

If you do not take this day right after the break up, then you may find yourself having an emotional break down later in the week. However, you only get 24 hours. The second the sun comes up signifying the second day, you have to start moving on. If that is hard to do the second day, you have to continually tell yourself, "I had my cry day now it is time to move on with my life."

Reconnect With Loved Ones
Hopefully your friends and family will be there to support you after a break up. Do not be afraid to tell them what happened. They might be able to provide a caring ear, encouragement, and advice. Spending more time with family and friends will help you to remember that you are still loved, even if you do not have a significant other in your life anymore.

Partake in Your Passions
So many times we forget or ditch the things we love when we are in a new relationship. Now that you have more free time in your life, spend it doing the things you love or searching for a new hobby. This will help you keep your mind off your ex and heal slowly.

Extract Emotions
It is natural to have second thoughts after a break up. Usually with these second thoughts comes the urge to call or write the person. Do not contact them under any circumstances. This is part of your healing time. If you cannot resist the urge to speak to them, write it out in a letter instead. Write whatever you want, and then burn it. Do not send it! You can also get out your emotions through journaling, writing songs or poetry, or even taking physical action, like kickboxing.

Erase Memories
You will never heal your broken heart if you continue to look at their picture or reread their love letters to you. However, burning all of the stuff that reminds them of you is very drastic. Instead, stick it all in a box and shove it in a closet or give it to someone you trust. You do not want to get rid of this stuff just yet. You may want to look back on it later in life.

Get motivated
Some people have bitter feelings toward their exes. Some behave in violent and crazy ways, while others let their performance level take a downward fall, be it in school or at work. However, you shouldn't let the actions of other person dictate the way the rest of your life will turn out.The sweetest revenge one could have is to be successful.

Being dumped is actually the best motivation to help push you to succeed in life. There is no better feeling than bumping into your ex four years down the road after you've dropped 20 pounds, put on a rock-hard six-pack or a beautiful figure -- not to mention a beautiful wife or handsome husband standing by your side. You won't have to worry about hiding the fact that you work for a local McDonald's. Instead, when your ex asks you what you've done with your life, you can start off with a big smile on your face, look at her wife-abusing husband or disloyal wife and the rest is history.

Recovering from a broken heart is a very hard thing to do. You just have to take the process slow and one day at a time. You also need to realize how valuable you are as a person. Life will eventually move on, and the best thing for you to do is to let life move on.


woaini_87 said...

i like your post.. will definitely follow yours if i ever break up...

Rabia Sensei said...


I hope your relationship will last 4ever..

Raman Katoch said...

No comments please...

I had very painful experience...!!! But i overcome now & trust me, now a days i jus laugh at myself when i remember thoes days... :) :) :)

Keep moving on...!!!

Rabia Sensei said...

Raman, I hope one day I'll will be doing the same. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic to be really some thing which I think I would never understand. It seems too complicated and really broad for me. I'm searching forward for your next post, I will try to get the hang of it!

ZiziMars14 said...

I've now ended 7 years long relationship... To be exact, he did.. He didn't want to go on.. I still want, still try, making the mistakes of contacting him... :( But, I think I finally realized there isn't anything I can do anymore.. And this hurts.. I know it will pass, but this pain its like it is killing me slowly, and I don't know how long will it last :(

He is cold, seems happy - he says he still loves me, but can't go on with me... ?!? I think I will never understand this :(
I have hopes, that he will rethink this, and come back, but reality is far from that.
It is just too hard to convince myself it is truly over :(

Thanks for the post, hope I will get out of this depressed times better an happier :)

Rabia Sensei said...

this article is actually taken somewhere from the net. I'm not sure which page. I should mention it though in my post. Hehe. Anyway, thank you.

Rabia Sensei said...

ZiziMars14, I've been there. So, I know exactly how it feel.

Seriously, only time can heal. How long? Depends on how you deal with it.

Keep yourself busy on things that you love. For myself, I have a lot of helps from my friends and family. I do a lot of fun things. Be kids again. Enjoying every single-hood moments with my crazy friends. Then, I met someone. Fall in love. And I'm happy now.

ZiziMars14, be strong now even though it's hard. Stop contacting your ex. Stop thinking about him. Keep yourself busy. When you are busy, you don't have time to think about him.

ZiziMars14, you are not alone. One day, you will meet your soul-mate. One day, you will be happy.

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